Everything’s Shocking


I think I’m going to start a shock rock band. But instead of an elaborate stage show, crazy costumes or playing with my own feces I’m just going to make a big point of not playing “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” and telling everyone I’m offended by the phrase “Merry Christmas.”

I bet I’ll get more death threats than Marilyn Manson tearing up a Bible.

I’ll have to give it a really offensive and controversial name also. Something like Antifa, Barack Obama or Empowered Woman. Maybe just Politically Erect or Donald Trump’s Tiny Penis will do.

Who knows, maybe I’ll learn to play the Star Spangled Banner while kneeling.

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Thor: Ragnarok


Welcome to the slaughter, what are you going to do?

I enjoyed the most recent release of the Thor franchise: Ragnarok. It had action. It had comedy. It had the Incredible Hulk. It had a little bit of stuff that confused me. (like Idris Elba’s character. Who the fuck was he? He looked like Dreadmon from the Ninja Turtles.) For the most part, it was an enjoyable escape from reality for two hours.

But this isn’t a review of Thor: Ragnarok. I don’t do movie reviews (very often). I do music reviews. And something about the music in Thor: Ragnarok really pissed me off!

Not the score. I’m sure the score was fine. I barely noticed it so it couldn’t have been that bad. What pissed me off was that the only rock song used in the film was “Immigrant Song” by Led Zeppelin. What the fuck, producers? Did you not see The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo? That song was already used in a movie this decade. Is there some new law stating that any movie about/set in/referencing the mythology of Scandinavia NEEDS to have that fucking Zeppelin song in it?

That’s total bullshit. There are more than enough bands that could provide songs for fight scenes that are actually from Scandinavia. I’m betting a few of them even worship Thor. Or Loki or Odin or whoever black metal band people worship. You don’t have to keep using that same song from an English band about Vikings or wizards or fucking trees talking to each other. For fuck’s sake, the only thing Scandinavia is known for is socialism and black metal.

But if you’d like to use the music from some American (well, American/Israeli or American/Canadian) bands I can think of a few good choices.

1.) Kiss has a song called “God of Thunder.” I’m not a huge Kiss fan so I can’t pick this track out of a lineup, but with all the focus on how Thor is the god of thunder in this flick you’d think that track would have made an appearance.

Then again, maybe they used that in the first movie. I’m pretty sure I fell asleep at some point during that one so maybe I missed it. Did it play during the credits like Black Sabbath did in the first Iron Man? Or it could have been used in the second film. There was a second film, right? I didn’t even bother to watch that one. Who can keep up with all these things?

B.) How about the song I got stuck in my head every time I saw that damn poster. It comes from the album Ragnarok by the greatest band ever to come to Earth from another galaxy. Yes, I’m talking about GWAR’s “Ragnarok.” That would have been perfect for some battle scenes. It might not be my favorite track of theirs, but it’s definitely top five.

Anything is better than that fucking “Immigrant Song.”

Bastards.

New Music


Heavy Metal 2000 CD coverI’ve seen a few posts where people list the music they’ve bought and give a little commentary on it. I find these posts pretty interesting so I thought I’d try my hand at one. Plus I was curious as to how much money I spend on music. I was hoping to make it a year before I posted this, but after six months the list it already pretty long. So here we go!

21 Nov 2014 (Amazon.com)
The Beatles – The White Album       $11.31
Soundtrack – Heavy Metal 2000       $4.61
Soundtrack – The Cable Guy            $4

Somewhere along the way I lost my copies of the White Album and the Heavy Metal 2000 soundtrack and it was time I replaced them. I thought I’d pick up the Cable Guy while I was at it.

hot-rocks22 Nov 2014 (FYE New Town Mall New Philadelphia, OH)
The Rolling Stones – Hot Rocks 1964-1971   $19.99
Nine Inch Nails- Pretty Hate Machine            $7.99
Ray Charles – Anthology                                Free

It seems weird that I went 31 years without owning any Rolling Stones music. And it seems even worse that it took a BUY 2 GET 1 FREE ON USED CDs sale to get me to buy it. I still might not have any Rolling Stones music if it weren’t for the fact that FYE doesn’t have much of a selection (unless you really love Linkin Park). The copy of Pretty Hate Machine is a remastered version with the cover of Queen’s “Get Down Make Love” added. This is the second or third time I’ve bought that Ray Charles disc. My mom keeps stealing it.

2 Jan 2015 (The Exchange Canton, OH)Independent Worm Saloon
Wednesday 13 – Spook & Destroy                     $6
Butthole Surfers- Independent Worm Saloon     $5
Elton John – Honky Chateau                               $7
Blind Melon                                                         $1

I know I’ve said of Wednesday 13 that one of the things I love about his music is that I can sing along without ever having heard it before, but I’ve been wanting a disc for a while. “Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters” is one of my favorite Elton John songs but wasn’t in my collection until I got it here. And how could I pass up the Butthole Surfers and Blind Melon discs for those prices?

17 Jan 2015 (FYE)
Filter – Title of Record                                       $1.50
Ray Charles – Live at Montreux (DVD)             $3

They were having some kind of deal. I gave the DVD to my mom so hopefully she wont steal the CD again.

Eyes Set To Kill - Masks23 Jan 2015 (The Agora Cleveland, OH)
Eyes Set to Kill – Masks                                     $10

Picked this one up the last time I saw Wednesday 13.

 

 

 

21 Feb 2015 (Amazon.com MP3)
Killler Be Killed                                                $7.99
Kittie- I’ve Failed You                                      $6.99
The Very Best of Kiss                                     $5.99
The Last Internationale – We Will Reign         $7.99

Kiss is another band I didn’t have anything by. I usually try to buy 3 or so albums at a time from Amazon.

alice-in-chains-dirt-album-cover25 April 2015 (FYE)
Wednesday 13 – Transylvania 90210                               $7.99
Alice in Chains – Dirt                                                         $2.99
Murderdolls – Beyond the Valley of the Murderdolls        $4.99
Screaming Trees – Sweet Oblivion                                  $1.99

This was a BUY 1 GET 1 HALF OFF Sale. I actually sold the Spook & Destroy disc after buying Transylvania 90210. I needed a replacement Dirt because mine was scratched to hell. I gave it to the Goodwill for someone else to enjoy, but they’ll only be able to enjoy about half of it. I had Sweet Oblivion on my Amazon wishlist, but I really made out here because I managed to get it much cheaper.

Forgetting Sarah Marshall2 May 2015
Bad Religion – Stranger Than Fiction                                 $6
Forgetting Sarah Marshall (BluRay)                                   $5

I love the movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall, but that may just be because I find frontal male nudity hilarious.

13 May 2015 (FYE)
Faith No More 3 Disc Set (Epic & Other Hits, The Real Thing and Angel Dust)     $7.49
Alice in Chains – Unplugged (CD+DVD)                                                                  $23.99

I actually passed up this FNM collection a week earlier, but then I heard Sol Invictus online and decided it was definitely worth the money. I’ve had my eye on this Unplugged CD + DVD and I finally gave up on the price going down.

Faith_No_More_-_Sol_Invictus_Album_Cover20 May 2015 (Amazon.com MP3)
Faith No More – Sol Invictus                                       $7.99
Elton John – Madman Across the Water                    $5.99

I ripped my copy of Madman from my mom’s old scratched to hell CD and the disc was so messed up that I could still hear skips listening to it in MP3 form. I’ve never had this happen before. So I got a replacement because I hate buying just one album from Amazon and I had to get Sol Invictus. 

So those are my new additions. How do you think I made out?