A Dissenting Opinion


I’m really starting to resent members of the current Republican administration saying they speak for me. It’s a completely audacious claim. I didn’t vote for them. I don’t agree with them. They don’t speak for me. They should check the settings on their mindreading equipment because they certainly aren’t getting the correct readings from me.

It boggles my mind how they continually brush off any criticism and never acknowledge there is a dissenting opinion to their worldview. Actually, there are several differing opinions, but whenever I check the news or Twitter I see someone rambling that they are “the voice of the people,” or that “there will be a revolution,” or  “violence” or some other such nonsense.

If you win an election by negative three million votes and have a disapproval rate of 60 percent you can’t claim to be the voice of the people.

I love the theory that only “coastal elites” dissent from the administration’s positions. I live far from any ocean and almost make enough money to be considered middle class. It takes me about two hours to get to the Lake Erie coast in the ’98 Toyota Avalon I purchase for $1,200 with nearly 190,000 miles on it. What about that says “coastal elite”?

I was livid when I read an Op-Ed from Congressman Bill Johnson in my local paper saying that everyone is benefiting from the TCJA and anything opposing it was “fake news.”

I responded to him on Twitter, “The TCJA barely made a difference in my paycheck and according to a recent article* has done nothing to increase wages or the standard of living for most Americans.
Are you going to ignore my story? Is my life ‘fake news’?”

He still hasn’t replied to my question.

What I find most confusing are the fans who can’t wrap their heads around why anyone wouldn’t be madly in love with President Trump. Were they asleep for the past 8 years? Did they forget the Obama years already? Did they think because he wasn’t a foreign-born Muslim that everyone would love him?**

To be honest, my dissent has nothing to do with any actions taken (or refrained from) by the chief executive. It’s mainly that I’m a member of the opposing party. I’ve heard people say this makes me a brainwashed mindless sheep and that there is no difference between the two major parties, but there are many easy-to-notice differences between Democrats and Republicans and my political beliefs and values align more closely with those of the former. For good or ill.

I never really understood why people had to believe Obama was Muslim or Kenyan to justify their hatred of him. Nowadays everyone is perfectly comfortable hating Democrats.

I’m not trying to say that my beliefs are better than anyone else’s, just that they’re different from some peoples.

And I’m not sure how I should go about ending this. I didn’t really have anything to say, I just wanted you to know that when you look at what’s going on in my country, my state, my city; it doesn’t reflect what I think or believe. It doesn’t reflect what a lot of other people believe. Hell, it doesn’t even reflect what the majority of people believe.

Even if some will swear the opposite.

 

*My local paper’s website is horrible so I wasn’t able to find the article I was referring. I’m sure it’s easy to find those that support my claim. And, to me, what’s worse is that I’m living it and this asshole doesn’t care.

**Will someone please invent a sarcasm punctuation symbol already?

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Are You Lost 23


I like to think it’s because I’m such a great writer that people are coming to read my thoughts on music and politics. Of course, what’s really happening is that people type stupid shit into Google and end up here.

After reading Lebrain’s posts about what search terms lead to his site I thought it would be fun to share what leads people to The Audible Stew.


Something noncontroversial that everyone agrees on.

duck guy hates nickelback

nude protest – All of the greatest protests are nude. True story.

oregon girl tits 2017

gwar porn 

naked summer girl – I would really like to do a blog about naked summer girls, but I’ll settle for doing one about naked winter or even naked autumn girls. If you are a naked seasonal girl feel free to contact me!

girl diver porn – so many strange types of porn. Is this a girl who does dirty things with a starfish?

insane clown posse porn – This isn’t a real thing, right! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD TELL ME THIS ISN’T A REAL THING!

juggalos naked – For some reason, it’s a lot easier to find pictures of Juggalettes naked. Not that you’d really want to see many of them.

heavy metal girls nude

what are the queers doing to the soil? – They’re building landing strips for gay Martians. That’s why we need SPACE FORCE!

Happy Birthday Joe Strummer!


I sure hope Joe Strummer sees this and gives me a shout out! That would do wonders for my blog stats!

Wait… what? Oh…

I really need to do a better job of keeping up with celebrity news.

Nine Inch Nails “Closure”


(25 November 1997, Nothing/Interscope)

I’m not a huge collector of CDs and DVDs. As such, I don’t have a huge number of shelves and other areas to store them. This posed a bit of a problem when my last girlfriend was moving in and trying to find space for her movie collection on my tiny storage rack. A friend from work had given it to me several years ago when I moved and it’s served me well ever since. It has enough space that the bottom is nothing but Daniel Tiger and Peppa Pig DVDs for my daughter. But when Darcy moved in it wasn’t nearly enough for both of our collections.

The obvious solution was to remove a few of my ‘questionable for children’ movies and put them in the less-visible entertainment stand cupboard. I suggested moving the GG Allin documentary Hated, GWAR’s Ultimate Video Gwarchive and Nine Inch Nails’ Closure to that area. My daughter hasn’t taken any interest in this sort of thing yet, but it’s good to be proactive.

It seemed like a good idea and we were able to make enough room on the shelves for both of our collections. Nevermind that she replaced Closure with Scarface. I think that’s a step in the right direction.

I’ve always loved the music video format and Nine Inch Nails were definitely at the top of the game. They were edgy, artsy, creative and controversial all rolled into one. The best part of this double VHS package is the tape that features all of their videos up to that point (with the exception of “Burn” from the Natural Born Killers soundtrack and “Gave Up” from the unreleased Broken movie).

Some of these videos I was familiar with from MTV and other stations: “Closer,” “The Perfect Drug,” “Head Like A Hole.” I even saw “Pinion” late one night. But a lot of these weren’t made to be aired on American TV. I was blown away by the strap-on clad, joint smoking guys in “Sin” and just a little disturbed by the torture machine in “Happiness in Slavery.” Throw in the musical snippets and electrocuting an elephant footage between the videos and you have the best music video collection ever released.

The other tape wasn’t nearly as good as I remembered. Which was strange considering this was one of the biggest musical influences on me during my teen years. Sure, there’s plenty of cool stuff on there: Backstage antics and destruction, celebrity/tourmate cameos featuring Lou Reed, Marilyn Manson, Jim Rose and David Bowie and live performances. Maybe in the DVD age, 60 minutes isn’t long enough for something like this and I would just like to have some more.

There are some great performances, “Terrible Lie,” “The Only Time,” and the “Hurt” duet with David Bowie are all great, but “Down in It” and “Something I Can Never Have” fall short. Plus, I’m unsure why “Wish” should appear on this tape when it appears on the other as both a live video and the official video. I guess I just would have liked to have seen more.

The best part is that we now live in the age of Youtube and all I have to do to see footage from early NIN shows, Lollapalooza or interviews is to open a tab on my browser and click down the rabbit hole. That’s never the same as having a nice physical copy of a video album. And this is one I’ll always cherish.

(I was going to post the NSFW “Happiness in Slavery,” but that’s not available on Youtube.)

You Can’t Say Anything Without Offending Someone


I’ve often heard the refrain “you can’t do anything without offending someone.” At first, I just shrugged it off as people being assholes and saying offensive things. I’ve never had much of a problem with it. But lately, I’ve noticed a few cases of political correctness run amok. I like to think of myself as a progressive and generally go with the flow, but there are a few terms I think it’s a shame we have whitewashed.

I mean, we used to be able to call people Nazis, Klansmen and racists. Now we have to call them “alt-right” or “White Nationalists.” It just doesn’t have the same gravitas to it. I mean, maybe we should get rid of Nazi as no one is actively plotting genocide (that we know of), but if you’re wearing a white robe with a pointy hat you’re a Klansman.

And the word ‘racist’ seems to have taken on the same air for whites as the N-word has for blacks. I’ve never seen white people get so offended at being called anything. We have our own racial epithets like ‘honkey,’ ‘birdshit’ and ‘peckerwood,’ but none of them ever elicited the same outrage as ‘spick,’ ‘chink’ or ‘nigger.’

Now people get pissed off about it. Someone will tell you that they never go to a certain Hardees because they have black cooks or that they’re voting for Trump because black on black violence makes it harder for them to do their job getting signatures on petitions, but when you call them racist they’re ready to fight you.

It’s so confusing.

We used to be able to call ignorant bigots like Archie Bunker buffoons, now we have to call them “Officer,” or “Your Honor” or “Mr. President.” It’s such a shame.

It’s weird that all these Trumpkins have such thin skin. Trump made his political name insulting President Obama. He has insulted all of his Republican rivals on the campaign trail, Senator John McCain, Pope Francis, NATO, The Department of Justice, the NFL, Justin Trudeau and one disabled reporter. You’d think a guy that dishes out the insults like that would be able to take them a little better. Oranges are known for their thick skin.

Everyone loved Trump for telling it like it is, but boy do they hate to see him called out.

But that’s a topic for another post.

 

Happy Birthday Prince


I never meant to do a “Happy Birthday” series, but that seems to be what’s happening. It’s working out OK so far. It’s nice to do something light every now and again.

I was going to tag Prince onto the Marky Mark post, but that seemed more than a little disrespectful. It’s a lot harder to decide which song to choose to celebrate his accomplishments. He’s like the exact opposite of Marky Mark.

So, I’m not going to just choose one.

 

I hope you’re all as sexually confused as I am after watching that last one…

What’s your favorite Prince song? Can you even choose?

Happy Birthday Mark Wahlberg


I’m loving this left-handed people calendar. It gives me the chance to do horrible posts like this.

I know what you’re thinking, Mark Wahlberg isn’t a musician. Well, to prove you right here’s the video for his 1991 hit single with the Funky Bunch “Good Vibrations”:

 

Thor: Ragnarok


Welcome to the slaughter, what are you going to do?

I enjoyed the most recent release of the Thor franchise: Ragnarok. It had action. It had comedy. It had the Incredible Hulk. It had a little bit of stuff that confused me. (like Idris Elba’s character. Who the fuck was he? He looked like Dreadmon from the Ninja Turtles.) For the most part, it was an enjoyable escape from reality for two hours.

But this isn’t a review of Thor: Ragnarok. I don’t do movie reviews (very often). I do music reviews. And something about the music in Thor: Ragnarok really pissed me off!

Not the score. I’m sure the score was fine. I barely noticed it so it couldn’t have been that bad. What pissed me off was that the only rock song used in the film was “Immigrant Song” by Led Zeppelin. What the fuck, producers? Did you not see The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo? That song was already used in a movie this decade. Is there some new law stating that any movie about/set in/referencing the mythology of Scandinavia NEEDS to have that fucking Zeppelin song in it?

That’s total bullshit. There are more than enough bands that could provide songs for fight scenes that are actually from Scandinavia. I’m betting a few of them even worship Thor. Or Loki or Odin or whoever black metal band people worship. You don’t have to keep using that same song from an English band about Vikings or wizards or fucking trees talking to each other. For fuck’s sake, the only thing Scandinavia is known for is socialism and black metal.

But if you’d like to use the music from some American (well, American/Israeli or American/Canadian) bands I can think of a few good choices.

1.) Kiss has a song called “God of Thunder.” I’m not a huge Kiss fan so I can’t pick this track out of a lineup, but with all the focus on how Thor is the god of thunder in this flick you’d think that track would have made an appearance.

Then again, maybe they used that in the first movie. I’m pretty sure I fell asleep at some point during that one so maybe I missed it. Did it play during the credits like Black Sabbath did in the first Iron Man? Or it could have been used in the second film. There was a second film, right? I didn’t even bother to watch that one. Who can keep up with all these things?

B.) How about the song I got stuck in my head every time I saw that damn poster. It comes from the album Ragnarok by the greatest band ever to come to Earth from another galaxy. Yes, I’m talking about GWAR’s “Ragnarok.” That would have been perfect for some battle scenes. It might not be my favorite track of theirs, but it’s definitely top five.

Anything is better than that fucking “Immigrant Song.”

Bastards.

Marilyn Manson Can Suck His Own Dick


You sicko. Why the hell would you click on that link?

I’ll tell you why: You’ve fallen victim to a great marketing scheme.

This post isn’t actually about Manson’s ability to perform autofellatio. I agree with the idea that someone wouldn’t do it themselves when they could get others to do? But some people are into some strange shit. Remember rule 43: If it exists there’s a fetish for it (and probably half a dozen websites dedicated to this fetish).

Some quick internet research tells me that about 1 percent of males can physically contact their penises with their mouths but only about 0.2 – 0.3 percent can actually perform the act.* I’ve heard Ron Jeremy can do it and has on film, but I’m not looking for that.** I don’t want to make any assumptions about the pale emperor’s length, flexibility or sexual desires (that’s not of my business and this is a free country), but damn that was a great marketing idea.

Sex sells. Even oral sex sells. Even oral sex with yourself sells.

Where did the rumor even begin? You have to wonder if there was a meeting at Interscope records and someone said, “What if we start a rumor you removed a few ribs to suck yourself off?” I imagine a bunch of guys in business suits sitting around a conference table nodding.

This was the 90s equivalent of Ozzy biting the heads off those doves. Or biting the head off that bat. Or snorting that line of army ants. Or pissing on the Alamo.

I think Marilyn Manson realizes there really is no such thing as bad publicity. You would think something like this would prevent people from running out and buying a record, and I’m sure it did stop some, but ultimately a lot of people bought Marilyn Manson albums.^ Even Michael Jackson continued to sell records while being charged with child molestation. He’s the artist on the top-selling album of all time. Being in the news just means people are thinking about you, and they may be thinking, “You know, Thriller was an awesome album.”

This principle used to not extend to politics. Ed Muskie dropped his bid for the Democratic Presidential Nomination amid rumors he was taking an exotic drug. 1972 vice presidential nominee, Thomas Eagleton’s history of mental illness and electroconvulsive therapy is thought to have played a part in George McGovern’s loss. ^*

Of course, this has changed in the past few years. After all, Donald Trump was elected president.

Have you figured out why I didn’t title this post “The Marketing Genius of Marilyn Manson?” Would you have clicked if that was the title?

 


* Although roughly 99.9999856 percent have tried.

**I’ve looked up some weird shit for this site, but I’m drawing a line right there.

^ I own several

^* Of course, Muskie served as Secretary of State under Jimmy Carter for a brief time and Eagleton won re-election to the Senate.