The Glorious Rachel Bloom


 

I don’t usually do much on Sunday. Most weeks I make it to church in the morning, but lately I haven’t been doing much after except for watching Netflix and eating pizza. I used to go to the gym and when the weather wasn’t so hot I’d go fishing, but lately it’s just been Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Pepperoni and Sausage.

But one Sunday activity that I’m pretty regular about is listening to the National Public Radio program “Wait Wait… Don’t Tell Me!” on npr.org. I really like staying up with current events and I also like comedy so a comedy news quiz seems tailor made for me.

Every show features a celebrity guest. This is usually some type of B-rated celebrity. You’re not going to have Leonardo DiCaprio or Stephen King, but you do get quite a few Governors and actors. They seem to have a lot of musicians on there too. I’ve heard interviews with Jewel, Ice Cube and George Clinton.

Rachel BloomBut my favorite was a comedienne named Rachel Bloom. I was actually fishing while listening to that episode, but when they started describing the YouTube video that propelled her to stardom I had to pause the podcast, reel in my line and sit and watch. “Fuck Me, Ray Bradbury,” is a great representation of Bloom’s comedy. It’s satirizing not only an entire genre of music, but also the entirety of popular culture. I mean, the idea that a bobble-headed, Britney Spears type singer would even be aware of Ray Bradbury is completely ludicrous. Which is what makes it so goddamn hilarious.

I just found out that she does have an album out, but I’ve heard most of the songs from exploring the rabbit hole on YouTube after “Bradbury” ends. The songs range from insane (“I Steal Pets”) to self deprecating (“We Don’t Need A Man”) to somewhat offensive (“Die When I’m Young”), but they’re all hilarious. I think my favorite is the sad ballad “Pictures Of Your Dick” which always leaves me in tears… of laughter.

I even managed to watch all 18 episodes of her TV Show “Crazy Ex-Girlfriend.” Obviously I enjoyed it, but it was a little long. Aside from how gorgeous Rachel Bloom is the main thing that kept my attention were the great tunes like “The Sexy Getting Ready Song,” “I Love My Daughter (But Not In A Creepy Way),” “I Gave You A UTI” and “Sexy French Depression.” I’ve often felt like the Josh character when he tries to woo the girl with his tune “Settle For Me.”

And I think I’m developing a fetish for Jewish girls. The Song “JAP Battle” pits two extremely beautiful Jewish American Princesses against each other. Add that to how I’ve fallen in love with Carrie Brownstein from Portlandia and Sarah Silverman and I think it’s safe to say I’d like to find a girl from the tribe.

I wonder what the result will be on porn sites for smart girls who can make me laugh.

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3 thoughts on “The Glorious Rachel Bloom

  1. Pingback: The Best of 2016 | The Audible Stew

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