The Best Canadian Rockers


The United States and Canada share the world’s longest undefended border, but I sometimes question wisdom of this. When I think of Bryan Adams, Theory of a Deadman, Nickelback, Barenaked Ladies and Justin Beiber I strongly support the option of bombing our neighbors to the north. Some people complain about Mexicans stealing American jobs, but I think the true travesty is not cheap produce, but Canadians sneaking south to take advantage of Americans’ horrible taste in music. When I think about how there’s a kid with an acoustic guitar somewhere in Saskatchewan trying to be the next Chad Kroeger I find myself in favor of preemptive strikes.

But Canada has given us some great things. maple syrup, hockey, the second most visits to my blog (although the UK is catching up with you)

and of course these ten bands:

10) Steppenwolf – I don’t think they’re a really a Canadian band, but they’re on Wikipedia’s list of Canadian bands and I couldn’t think of 10 bands.

9) Bubbles – Bubbles is pretty bad ass on guitar. And he even played in a band before his stint in Sunnyvale.

8) Anvil

7) Crash Test Dummies – It’s probably going to piss a lot of people off that I put the “Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm” band ahead of Anvil.

6) Those guys who did “American Woman” before Lenny Kravitz – That was a pretty cool song before he got a hold of it.

If any of you ever find yourself in need of American citizenship, use me for your green card.

If any of you ever find yourself in need of American citizenship, use me for your green card.

5) The Tea Party – Of all the bands I discovered on MuchMusic USA in my teens (Artificial Joy Club, Our Lady Peace, Change of Heart) The Tea Party are the only one I still enjoy today.

4) Kittie – Maybe I just like them because they’re hot chicks, but unlike a lot of other people who bought Spit and forgot all about them I’ve been keeping tabs on them and find their newer stuff to be a lot better than the old stuff.

3) Neil Young

2) Rush – Obviously the greatest Canadian Band ever.

1) Leonard Cohen -Perhaps the greatest songwriter ever. Not just the greatest Canadian songwriter. I know it’s a little cliche to put “Hallelujah” here, but very few other songs give me chills the way this one does.

So if any of you hosers disagree with my list, the largest bodies of freshwater in the world are separating us. I don’t want to look like a hockey player…

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9 thoughts on “The Best Canadian Rockers

  1. Pingback: Thank You 2014 | The Audible Stew

  2. I’m guessing some of you know of A LOT more Canadian bands than I do! I haven’t heard of most of the bands mentioned (and to be perfectly honest I’ve only heard 2 Crash Test Dummies songs and can’t remember one). But it is cool to get so much feedback.
    So the Biebs is now an American huh? Damn! Time to defect… what country wants me?

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  3. I hate Rush but I love this list—-I just posted the Crash Test Dummies a few hours ago and was sure that was the only love they would get this year (or any year).

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  4. Can’t include Rush without Max Webster, or Tea Party without NO MEANS NO. And if Tragically Hip are included, I also vote for Doug & The Slugs, FM, or Offenbach. But PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don’t judge Canada by Beiber!!

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  5. BUBBLES MADE THE LIST! How could I complain about this?

    My buddy Craig would say you forgot “Canada’s Greatest Band” Sloan. Aaron might say The Tragically Hip. I would argue for Helix. But by and large this is a good list! I don’t like Crash Test Dummies at all though…if you had heard their later albums…woahboy.

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