“OK guys,” Matt Vance said when he showed up to practice 15 minutes late. “I think we need to have a band meeting.”
“Oh Christ,” Adam moaned. “You’ve been back in the band for three months. What the hell is going on now?”
“Look. It’s freezing out there. We need to invest in a space heater.”
The group let out a collective moan.
“We’ve been over this Matt,” Adam said. “We can’t afford one.”
“Look, I’ve saved up a hundred bucks from working at Burger King and I’m willing to splurge so we can keep warm.”
“It’s not that cold out,” Hal Levatine said. “Plus, we’re in the garage so we don’t have to worry about the wind.”
“Yeah, I see your point. But it’s freezing out there! We have to do something. Maybe if it was in the 50’s…”
“It’s 53 degrees outside,” said Josh Randall looking up from his phone.
“Why is everyone so against getting a space heater?”
“Well, the rental agreement says we cant have a kerosene or propane heater,” Adam said.
“It also says you can only have half of the people living here that you actually do. It also says you’re not allowed to have pets.”
“You leave Mr. Whiskers out of this!” Adam snapped.
“OK. OK, what about an electric heater?”
“I don’t want to pay for the extra electricity,” Josh said. “We’re already floating the bill for what? A PA. Two Amps. A drum set…”
“It wouldn’t be so bad if you would turn off your drums after your done using them.”
“I’ll pay the extra,” Matt pleaded.
“Look, we have one outlet out there. If we plug anymore shit into it we’re liable to start a fire.”
“At least then we’d be warm.”
“Stop being such a pussy and come on,” Josh said. “Once we get out there and get going you won’t even notice the cold.”
“I wish global warming would come back. Why is it taking this year off?”
“That’s just a myth,” said new member and conspiracy theorist Eric Shawn.
“Come on guys, last week is was colder here than in Antarctica.”
“Yeah, and Metallica was down there rocking,” said Gillis. “So grab your bass and let’s get to practicing so maybe someday we can rock Antarctica.”